What the f@ck is it?

Ok, so we went for a "soiree" the other weekend. Anna had it on good understanding that it was a quiet little number, just us and 3-4 other families and that the food was couscous with jambon en cidre (ham with cider for those who failed GCSE French - me included). It turned out to be the village annual dance with 300+ people and a meal of fuck-knows-what!